GCN Radio - August 19, 2005
Transcribed by Vombatus

To listen to this episode, visit http://www.gaychristian.net/gcnradio

[GCN Radio Intro]

BRIAN: It's Show 2 of Season 3 if you're scoring at home, and we're glad to be here.

JUSTIN: Absolutely!

BRIAN: Technology is amazing, just make it happen. Well, it's Friday, weekend is coming up...

JUSTIN: TGIF, that's all I have to say.

BRIAN: It's a great day. I am going to be heading to the Indiana State Fair this weekend, looking forward to that. Yay!

JUSTIN: Yay!

BRIAN: Funnel cakes for me!

JUSTIN: I love funnel cakes! I have not had funnel cakes in the longest time, Brian.

BRIAN: Really?

JUSTIN: I want a funnel cake. Can you send me a funnel cake?

BRIAN: I'll direct IM you a funnel cake.

JUSTIN: Thank you. If you could attach that to an e-mail and just send it to me.

BRIAN: [Laughter]

JUSTIN: I want some funnel cake. Seriously, it's been--I have not had funnel cake since I was a kid, and I don't ever go to the fair, I don't like the fair, I'm boring, I don't like the fair.

BRIAN: Awww...

JUSTIN: I like theme parks, I just don't like the fair. But whenever I do go someplace that has funnel cakes I always want one but I usually, for one reason or another, don't get a chance to get it. So I want some! Send me some funnel cake.

BRIAN: We're hoping to have a little fair food, and a lot of good things, and food for thought--hey! Me and my segues, there ya' go--food for thought that we're passing out to folks: Last week we started a new feature where you could call in with a question...

JUSTIN: That's right!

BRIAN: and call our 800 number and answer a question. This week, we have a brand-new question.

JUSTIN: That's right, and make sure you listen next week and you can hear what some answers were to last week's question. But in the meantime we've got a brand-new question for you.

BRIAN: All right!

JUSTIN: The question of the week is: "If you had the opportunity to basically sit the entire Christian world down and teach them one thing... you can teach all the Christians in the world one thing... what would it be?" So this is your question for this week, what do you think that the whole Christian community really needs to learn? So, send us your answers and you can do that by giving us a call at--this is toll-free if you're in the US--1-888-GAY4GOD, or you can log on to http://www.gaychristian.net/gcnradio/ and there's a little form you can fill out there. But we'd rather have you call because we'd rather hear your wonderful voices.

BRIAN: Exactly, and it's easier to put your voice on when we have it to use.

JUSTIN: That's right! Otherwise I will have to do an impression of you, and you might end up sounding like Homestar Runner.

BRIAN: That could be interesting. You know, we'll have that on a future show, too, where we imitate all of the members of GCN. Well, no, that's great.

JUSTIN: I just had to share this one thing, Brian, before we jump to our guest. I, today, checked my mail and I had a thing from Evangelicals Concerned. And I love Evangelicals Concerned, it was founded by Dr. Ralph Blair, we've talked about them before and we've had him on the show, and every quarter he sends out a thing called Record & Review. And in the Record & Review he talks about some of the big news articles and things going on in the world. And I had to share this one because I really appreciated it. Apparently there was an Exodus conference in Virginia. Exodus is the national, actually international, ex-gay umbrella organization; they believe that gay people can become straight. And here's what Dr. Blair has to say: "Ex-gay leader Frank Worthen and his wife Anita led a workshop on making your marriage work at this summer's Exodus ex-gay conference in Virginia. Frank Worthen discussed the problem of ex-gays' same-sex fantasies while they try to make love with their wives. He said it would be prudent for the couple to wait a year after marriage before they attempted sexual intercourse. They told they ex-gay men that they would be ready for marriage to a woman 'when their desire to be protected becomes a desire to protect.' Anita Worthen explained that ex-gay men experience erectile dysfunction with their wives and that wives must offer extra help here. But the couple warned against oral sex, which, they said, 'could remind the ex-gay man of his attraction to the homosexual lifestyle.'"

BRIAN: Hmmmm....

JUSTIN: "Frank Worthen recommended that the men work out at the gym to build 'hard and masculine bodies' in order to be able to enjoy the feel of their wives 'mushy' flesh."

BRIAN: Oh! I'm sure many of our female members are going to have something to say about women's 'mushy' flesh.

JUSTIN: Mushy. Now, of course as you know, our show is a family show. We don't normally get that... that's as explicit as we ever get! This is not a show for explicit content, but I just was astounded to read--well, I really wasn't that surprised, because I've been to ex-gay conferences before, and I have heard things like that--but it was really interesting to hear that. But I just wanted to share that with our listeners.

BRIAN: That's great, that's a nice little morsel of knowledge that we can take into our day about the ex-gay movement.

JUSTIN: Well, the thing is when the ex-gay folks go out there on Christian radio and Christian magazines and so on and they say that "I used to be gay and now I'm straight, and I've been changed", a lot of people out there, a lot of parents and friends and pastors of gay folks hear these things and really believe, "Oh this is true, you could really become straight if you wanted." But this is the side of the story that they don't ever tell you, that these guys are having trouble in the sexual area with their wives. And of course, the flip side is true as well. This particular article was just focusing on gay men, but there are a number of lesbians in Exodus as well. So, yes, we should get to our guest before too much time gets away from us. Our guest is a fantastic guy. He is a volunteer with GCN, in fact. His name is Joshua Alexander, and he is a volunteer who is coordinating the GCN 2006 Annual Conference in January. So, welcome to the show, Josh, we're happy to have you.

JOSHUA: Thank you, it's good to be on.

BRIAN: And you go by Josh, or Joshua, or Stud or Christian Hottie or what? What should we call you?

JOSHUA: Joshua is fine.

BRIAN: Okay, great. You know it was funny because when I was talking to you before I couldn't remember exactly what your board name was on the GCN message board, but I did remember, "Oh, that Disney guy!"

JOSHUA: I'm the ambassador to Disney, I rival Justin. My testimonial at the last GCN conference in part was about how the first time I came to GCN ministry and met Justin was while I was at Walt Disney World, in fact it was last year. That and the Golden Girls and Harry Potter are probably the three biggest forums... I tend not to leave the Movies, Music, Books, and Television folder on the message board. That's just where I seem to lurk, so that's where most people know me from.

JUSTIN: Oh wow, so you're a big fan of Disney and the Golden Girls, Josh, could you be any more stereotypical here? [laughter]

JOSHUA: Well, I tend to enjoy things that are fun, that are uplifting, that remind me of everything that was great about being a child.

BRIAN: So speaking of Disney and Disney World, I understand that GayChristian.Net is having it's next conference in... ta-dah!... Orlando.

JOSHUA: That's right! The 2006 Annual Conference is going to be held... it's actually being held in Kissimmee, Florida, which is right next to Orlando. It's the small city that Walt Disney World is located in. The conference is not being held at Disney World, it's being held in Kissimmee, Florida at the Holiday Inn Nikki Bird Resort and probably the first thing I'll mention is we have the conference each year in January in part because it's the one time of year where you're most likely going to be able to take time off to come to a conference or that you're already going to be on holiday or vacation and can come. And what better place in the country to congregate and to fellowship together than in sunny central Florida where...

BRIAN: Sunny Central Florida! That's right, I'm thinking, hey, WARM!

JOSHUA: The average temperature is 65 to 70 degrees in the first and second week of January so it's a wonderful time.

JUSTIN: It's a fantastic time, it really is. I know we may have some folks listening to the show -in fact I know we have some people listening to the show--who are not members of the site over at GayChristian.Net or are new members that don't know a lot of the folks... this is only our second conference, so if this is something that appeals to you, to be in a group of believers, strong committed Christians who are gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered or are just supportive of gay and lesbian folks, by all means, please, come to the conference in Orlando. Last year in Dallas we had just an absolutely, absolutely terrific time.

BRIAN: What kinds of things can people expect this year?

JOSHUA: Well, it's a three day conference that begins on a Friday and then goes through Sunday night. We're going to have some lunches and dinners with different people and panels discussing topics that are relevant to GLBT Christians and friends and allies. And then we're going to have specific programming on Saturday and Sunday that might be relevant to where they're at in their walk with God and their life. Some of the workshops that we're hoping to offer are going to include things like Homosexuality and Scripture, helping people to confront 'clobber' passages and find truth and love in the Word of God. We're going to have a workshop called Powerful Prayer, scriptural teaching on peaceful prayer practices. We're hoping to offer called Of Ruth and Naomi, which will talk about women's issues in the church in our world today. Things like Celibacy and Christianity, issues and support for those who are Side B believers and who choose celibate lives. And other things like Diversity and Inclusion: Minorities within a Minority, Queer Theology, and something that's of particular interest to my heart that we're calling What's a Mom to Do?, and that's a workshop for friends and family members of GLBT Christians who are themselves believers and who are trying to reconcile how to support their loved ones.

JUSTIN: Joshua sounds really serious right now! But I can promise you that in addition to this being a very spiritually enriching conference, I can promise that it's going to be a lot of fun as well, because we have a lot of fun people with great senses of humor and just a great spirit of joy about life in general. So, don't think that if you come that it's going to be a lot of just sitting around...

BRIAN: Academic headiness.

JUSTIN: Exactly. Because it's not! We're really a great group of people and I look forward to seeing who shows up and meeting a whole bunch of new folks this year.

JOSHUA: There's going to be a massive party going on in Orlando and we're just going to happen to have a conference going on at the same time.

BRIAN: Well, let me ask this question, gentlemen... How would someone register to be part of this great thing we've been talking about?

JUSTIN: What a great question!

JOSHUA: Registration is very simple, it's very quick. You go to www.gaychristian.net, the main website. There will be a link on every page for registration. Just go ahead and click on that. It'll have a short amount of information on the main page. We have a five page flyer that you can download in .PDF format. It's a full color brochure and it has information about the programming and about the GCN ministry. So that way for people, like Justin said, who are not members of the GCN ministry or who have never been to the conference before can download that for themselves. They can also share it with family members, friends, people at their church or organizations who they think might be interested in joining them at this conference, because I think it might be great to have people bring others along with them to experience this Christ-centered awesome weekend with them in Florida. But they can download the flyer on the registration page, which they can find at www.gaychristian.net.

BRIAN: Wonderful. You know, you mentioned something, a great way to meet new people, or you want to do something with your partner, something Christ-filled or a retreat right after Christmas to start off the new year. So, one of the things we wanted to talk about on the show today is what is entailed in a Christ-centered relationship between two people of the same sex. I mean, how would you define the kind of relationship that you and your partner have?

JOSHUA: Well, I would consider it just like any other marriage. What's interesting is that many years ago, when I was myself struggling with the same issues of faith, scripture, and sexuality that all of us go through and trying to reconcile could I be Christian, could I follow Christ, could I be gay?, I myself was opposed to the even concept of gay marriage, let alone two people in a committed relationship and referring to it as a marriage. What's wonderful about our relationship, about what I would say our marriage, Jed and I, is that before we met, and I'll speak for myself, I was at the point where I either thought I was going to be alone for the rest of my life, or... I was going to be alone for the rest of my life. [laughter] Either one or the other, but it wasn't going to be anything beyond that. And in a time of significant pain and emotion, I really broke down one night, and I still remember when I did it, I got down on my hands and knees and said, "Please, I don't want to be alone anymore on this earth. And I want someone who's going to make me be better, someone who complements me, someone who is a companion, someone who's a good friend, who encourages me, who lifts me up, who challenges me each day to grow and to be better." And what was amazing was that at that moment I felt kind of like the Holy Spirit guided me to pray particularly for this specific thing, which was, I said, "God, make me the sort of person I need to be for you to bring that person that you have ready for me into my life." In other words, I spent my entire life doing what the world teaches you to do, which is make your physical body look better, go to this bar, go on this Internet site, talk to these friends, go out on this date, behave this way; do all of the worldly things and then you'll get what you want. And in that moment, I prayed to God, "Help me, make me the sort of person I need to be in order to deserve that person that I believe in faith that you have out there for me." And it was practically overnight, I mean really overnight almost, when we met.

BRIAN: How did you meet?

JOSHUA: We met through GCN. [laughs] I can say that I didn't come to GCN looking to meet someone. I really came to GCN because I was looking for an organization and a body of believers that put Christ first, which I feel is the most important thing. And it just so happened that around that time Jed also experienced a spiritual movement towards finding a body of believers that were in alignment with how he practices his faith in God and Christ. But you know, I think, Justin was asking me earlier what's the secret, and you can ask me fifty years from now when we're still together what the secret is and I tell you the same thing that I'll say right now, which was for me anyway, there were three components and they're very simple. Number one is I said, "God, make me the person I need to be and tell me the person I should pick." I didn't want the world to make that decision, and I didn't want to make that decision because at that time I was in the world, too. I wanted God to make that decision, it needed to be God's choice. Then, quitting was never an option, giving up was just not a choice. No matter what adversities, what challenges, whatever distractions the Enemy threw our way or that the world put out there, or whatever junk I personally brought to the relationship... whatever it was, failure and quitting was just not an option. And the third thing is that I wake up every morning and I view our relationship as if it were the first day that we are together and the last day that we are together. If you won't allow petty conflicts to stand in the way of spending time with that person, then every moment will be precious and valuable. It's true for me and I still feel that way and I know I will fifty years from now. We can do a GCN Radio in fifty years, and I'll still be saying the same thing.

JUSTIN: Well, I hope that we're still doing this in fifty years, that could be fun!

BRIAN: Well, Joshua Alexander, we appreciate the time that you've devoted to us today and the good words that you've shared, so thanks again.

JOSHUA: Thank you.

JUSTIN: Well, that about wraps it up for this week's edition of GCN Radio. As always, you can listen to us every Friday at http://www.gaychristian.net/gcnradio/ or subscribe to our podcast and there are a number of places you can do that.

BRIAN: The podcast.

JUSTIN: Yes, including the website. Don't forget our question of the week, "If you could sit the entire Christian world down and teach them one thing, what would it be?" And you can give us a call at 1-888-GAY4GOD to answer that question or go over to the website. And if folks have comments or questions on the show, Brian, what should they do?

BRIAN: Send me some e-mail. Comments, questions, guest suggestions, what have you, just send them along to gcnradio@gaychristian.net. GCN Radio is a copyrighted 2005 production of GayChristian.Net. So for this week, I'm Brian...

JUSTIN: ...and I'm Justin. Have a great week.